Monday, January 9, 2012

The emotional state of my blood sugar

I know that stress tends to raise blood sugar numbers.  But sometimes I'm unsure of whether my emotional state is caused by my blood sugar or if my kitty-wompus (yep, I said it) blood sugar is whats causing my emotional state.
This morning I woke up with this feeling in my stomach that something wasn't right.  It could have been that I was up every hour or so testing, and I had spent the last 12 hours worried that I did something wrong when I changed my set and I maybe wasn't getting any insulin.  It could be that something dumb happened yesterday that was still bothering me today.  It could be that the same dumb thing has happened four hundred times and sometimes that means the beginning of another crappy thing...though it only means that half of the time and I was unsure which kind of time this was.  It could be that I was going back to work after 2 days off and I didn't know what to expect and I hate hate HATE feeling unprepared. Or in the dark.  Or blind sided...I just hate not knowing. could be that I was hungry and sugary juice at 4:30 this morning was the only thing in my stomach and I was misinterpreting that icky feeling as emotional when it was physical.  Was I a weird kind of irritated/crabby/emotional today because my blood sugars were up and down on their own little roller coaster for the last day or was I THAT upset about this stupid thing that shouldn't have bothered me (but on the right day may have done so no matter what) that it was messing with my blood sugar.  
Frustrating questions I don't really want to know the answer to...because either way...I feel like I'm not in control.  Either way...somethings got to be done...because I might be making myself crazy.

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